Friday, October 01, 2004
my favorite
and i'm back in the muslim restaurant. i like a place where i can write. obviously. it's august 26, 2004. the kid is crying and berated.
today i go to hong kong. tomorrow i go home. home is washington, dc. our nation's capital. i think it's corporal punishment. punishment of the body. not to be confused with capital punishment. punishment of the finances. yeah i was watching china business news today and i started to think that economics is interesting. time to eat.
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and i am on the train. this is a pretty good system act while acting write while not acting takes away the time for thinking course the thoughts are sneaky they get in there anyway. but i'm expanding my consciousness do you get it every thought must be shared every thought with every one. with every thought i share. thoughts i share thoughts. it is part of the process. i am a warrior. we are at war. the enemy? thoughts. but also not the enemy they provide the motivation for this art i share with you. they move through me to you you threw yihou jiu do.
after you are through you do. you are due. the seat across from me a girl text messages her phone now she regards me she is finished and she's messing with her purse. i may have someone sitting next to me in which case i will have to move my things but we shall see.
i'm flying home. tomorrow flying home united is the carrier i must print out the ticket what do you want, news? detailed details? what do you want?
...
what do you got?
and then i turn to take a break but people try not to make eye contact people hate to make eye contact in this country or maybe it's just me. i miss jenny. i'm guessing the feeling will pass and diana made a very good move in the baseball league surprising the hell out of me very good very impressive i thought she was done i'm not allowed to talk to her about the league i don't know why i just don't understand all i know is don't talk about it but now the love is rekindled. maybe i'll change the names again. or maybe i won't. maybe fuck it all. fuck it all.
the train is moving now it isn't very steady it is difficult to write perhaps i'll have to take a break and wrestle with thoughts. they're fighting harder now because they're scared. i'm getting stronger. the stronger i get the harder they fight. i get tired sometimes but that's the key to fight without fighting. be as peaceful as the water. the surface ripples but the depths are still. there's a lake in eastern russia that is so deep it has a large percentage of the earth's fresh water. i gotta say iambs are the way to go maybe i'll write straight iambs from now on. except for that. no obviously that's ridiculous. but ridiculous is good. we like ridiculous beats the fuck out of boring. shit, what doesn't beat boring? stupid beats boring.
transitions transitions transitions. it's ok to write on a train one must flow lightly the flow is light you can use ob.
bloody bloody blood diana prefers pads she makes correct decisions except she's a slut. course if she weren't a slut she would never have gotten with me sluts and virgins that's what i get.
it's because i'm super-nice what no one understands is i am the alpha male. i'm secretly courting every woman i want every woman forever i don't want your pussy i don't want your heart i want your soul. i am the antichrist. and i smile and talk and make you laugh i'm nice and cute and so non-threatening maybe i wouldn't do it if it wasn't so fuckin easy who the fuck am i kidding of course i do it it's what i do it's so fuckin easy because i'm me and it's what i do.
so you are mine. you're all mine, ladies. my friends are uneasy when i talk to their girls cause they know i talk to them i connect in a way they can't you like it don't you ladies the way i talk to you.
you think about me. you think about dumping that schlub for an upgrade. it's running through your head i can see it i can see it running through your head. you love him but youbelong to me. yes. you are mine and there's nothing you can do about it.
so she's fucking this biologist they play go together she thinks of me. i am the alpha male i suppose i'll have to go fuck her. it's love. or something. i've always hated jealousy but maybe i'll just have to run with it. use the fuel. increase the power. where are we going how can we know where we're going if we don't know where we are?
and donna's in canada. she will be tomorrow. she belongs to me. another one to check off the list. virgin. didn't fuck her. no more fucking.
women cover their pussies when they see me cause they fear the giant spiked club iin my pants. it's involuntary they fear it but they want it. they can't stop thinking about it. in the female, fear is mixed with desire.
am i not beautiful? of course you are, baby. of course you are. women are most beautiful with their children. great with child the woman is great with child the woman is great.
air conditioning everywhere conditioning the chinese keep it cold. i can't shake the feeling that we're pumping our air full of chemicals i'm sure medicine in 50 years will laugh at what we do. assuming we're still alive.
i think i could learn cantonese. i'm starting to get a feel for it. i probly never will, though. when i was first in college i used to make big plans one for each major all the classes i would take of course i would be a motherfucker. i slowly had to let them go as i did nothing watch them fall by the wayside bye bye all gone a tale told by an idiot.
i'm tired i haven't had my afternoon nap i'm gonna fuck diana hall when i get home that's my mo i suppose go somewhere come back fuck diana hall. my mojo gets crossed up overseas i don't wanna be the mysterious stranger with whom you have a moment of weakness. i want your soul (i said that before). almost there. shenzhen. then action. i'll take jealousy and turn it into fucking. and then what? is that all i got? it's pathetic. pathetic. i'm pathetic.
and off train walk walk walk china customs walk walk hong kong entry customs walk walk purchase subway ticket walk walk wait for subway go.
it's not really a subway it's a commuter train. hong kong is a city that's really packed together and a bundh of land with nothing. the commuter train goes through the nothing connecting the city with shenzhen, which i guess is a city. something smells like fresh mint. this old dude next to me is sniffing this thing with holes in it. it's black and plastic.
hong kong. my favorite place. i get to see william. i think i'll invite him to breakfast. in the morning. before my flight. lots of writing on the flight that's when the thinking occurs. that's the thing. in the middle of the action, there's no thinking. the holy grail is to write every moment write every action but then there's no action it's beautiful it's beautiful in its impossibility.
it's not on this train the weather report said it would rain here this mint smell is freaky.
you know you could follow the rules because you believe in them or how bout just following the rules when it doesn't make much difference. i was at wrigley field and my row was conveniently located so that every person and their brother tried to go through my row they wanted me to stand up. you can't do this little thing for me they said every 30 seconds and after a while the usher started helping me no you can't go through there but when the big fat guy came up he was let through he was a cop.
i like cops. they're my favorite.
we used to motivate the people by not letting them have anything. now we're trying this luxuries/spending thing it's working out pretty well as long as they use that credit card. keep the people busy. don't let them find out. don't let them find out. heavens no! lest they should find out.
GIANTS: shinnosuke abe (catcher)
hiroki kokubo
______ takahashi
______ kiyohara
tigers: ______ kanemoto
kei igawa (pitcher)
_____ akahoshi
fujimoto.
i love it!!
today i go to hong kong. tomorrow i go home. home is washington, dc. our nation's capital. i think it's corporal punishment. punishment of the body. not to be confused with capital punishment. punishment of the finances. yeah i was watching china business news today and i started to think that economics is interesting. time to eat.
-------------------------
and i am on the train. this is a pretty good system act while acting write while not acting takes away the time for thinking course the thoughts are sneaky they get in there anyway. but i'm expanding my consciousness do you get it every thought must be shared every thought with every one. with every thought i share. thoughts i share thoughts. it is part of the process. i am a warrior. we are at war. the enemy? thoughts. but also not the enemy they provide the motivation for this art i share with you. they move through me to you you threw yihou jiu do.
after you are through you do. you are due. the seat across from me a girl text messages her phone now she regards me she is finished and she's messing with her purse. i may have someone sitting next to me in which case i will have to move my things but we shall see.
i'm flying home. tomorrow flying home united is the carrier i must print out the ticket what do you want, news? detailed details? what do you want?
...
what do you got?
and then i turn to take a break but people try not to make eye contact people hate to make eye contact in this country or maybe it's just me. i miss jenny. i'm guessing the feeling will pass and diana made a very good move in the baseball league surprising the hell out of me very good very impressive i thought she was done i'm not allowed to talk to her about the league i don't know why i just don't understand all i know is don't talk about it but now the love is rekindled. maybe i'll change the names again. or maybe i won't. maybe fuck it all. fuck it all.
the train is moving now it isn't very steady it is difficult to write perhaps i'll have to take a break and wrestle with thoughts. they're fighting harder now because they're scared. i'm getting stronger. the stronger i get the harder they fight. i get tired sometimes but that's the key to fight without fighting. be as peaceful as the water. the surface ripples but the depths are still. there's a lake in eastern russia that is so deep it has a large percentage of the earth's fresh water. i gotta say iambs are the way to go maybe i'll write straight iambs from now on. except for that. no obviously that's ridiculous. but ridiculous is good. we like ridiculous beats the fuck out of boring. shit, what doesn't beat boring? stupid beats boring.
transitions transitions transitions. it's ok to write on a train one must flow lightly the flow is light you can use ob.
bloody bloody blood diana prefers pads she makes correct decisions except she's a slut. course if she weren't a slut she would never have gotten with me sluts and virgins that's what i get.
it's because i'm super-nice what no one understands is i am the alpha male. i'm secretly courting every woman i want every woman forever i don't want your pussy i don't want your heart i want your soul. i am the antichrist. and i smile and talk and make you laugh i'm nice and cute and so non-threatening maybe i wouldn't do it if it wasn't so fuckin easy who the fuck am i kidding of course i do it it's what i do it's so fuckin easy because i'm me and it's what i do.
so you are mine. you're all mine, ladies. my friends are uneasy when i talk to their girls cause they know i talk to them i connect in a way they can't you like it don't you ladies the way i talk to you.
you think about me. you think about dumping that schlub for an upgrade. it's running through your head i can see it i can see it running through your head. you love him but you
so she's fucking this biologist they play go together she thinks of me. i am the alpha male i suppose i'll have to go fuck her. it's love. or something. i've always hated jealousy but maybe i'll just have to run with it. use the fuel. increase the power. where are we going how can we know where we're going if we don't know where we are?
and donna's in canada. she will be tomorrow. she belongs to me. another one to check off the list. virgin. didn't fuck her. no more fucking.
women cover their pussies when they see me cause they fear the giant spiked club iin my pants. it's involuntary they fear it but they want it. they can't stop thinking about it. in the female, fear is mixed with desire.
am i not beautiful? of course you are, baby. of course you are. women are most beautiful with their children. great with child the woman is great with child the woman is great.
air conditioning everywhere conditioning the chinese keep it cold. i can't shake the feeling that we're pumping our air full of chemicals i'm sure medicine in 50 years will laugh at what we do. assuming we're still alive.
i think i could learn cantonese. i'm starting to get a feel for it. i probly never will, though. when i was first in college i used to make big plans one for each major all the classes i would take of course i would be a motherfucker. i slowly had to let them go as i did nothing watch them fall by the wayside bye bye all gone a tale told by an idiot.
i'm tired i haven't had my afternoon nap i'm gonna fuck diana hall when i get home that's my mo i suppose go somewhere come back fuck diana hall. my mojo gets crossed up overseas i don't wanna be the mysterious stranger with whom you have a moment of weakness. i want your soul (i said that before). almost there. shenzhen. then action. i'll take jealousy and turn it into fucking. and then what? is that all i got? it's pathetic. pathetic. i'm pathetic.
and off train walk walk walk china customs walk walk hong kong entry customs walk walk purchase subway ticket walk walk wait for subway go.
it's not really a subway it's a commuter train. hong kong is a city that's really packed together and a bundh of land with nothing. the commuter train goes through the nothing connecting the city with shenzhen, which i guess is a city. something smells like fresh mint. this old dude next to me is sniffing this thing with holes in it. it's black and plastic.
hong kong. my favorite place. i get to see william. i think i'll invite him to breakfast. in the morning. before my flight. lots of writing on the flight that's when the thinking occurs. that's the thing. in the middle of the action, there's no thinking. the holy grail is to write every moment write every action but then there's no action it's beautiful it's beautiful in its impossibility.
it's not on this train the weather report said it would rain here this mint smell is freaky.
you know you could follow the rules because you believe in them or how bout just following the rules when it doesn't make much difference. i was at wrigley field and my row was conveniently located so that every person and their brother tried to go through my row they wanted me to stand up. you can't do this little thing for me they said every 30 seconds and after a while the usher started helping me no you can't go through there but when the big fat guy came up he was let through he was a cop.
i like cops. they're my favorite.
we used to motivate the people by not letting them have anything. now we're trying this luxuries/spending thing it's working out pretty well as long as they use that credit card. keep the people busy. don't let them find out. don't let them find out. heavens no! lest they should find out.
GIANTS: shinnosuke abe (catcher)
hiroki kokubo
______ takahashi
______ kiyohara
tigers: ______ kanemoto
kei igawa (pitcher)
_____ akahoshi
fujimoto.
i love it!!
